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in: TFS Dragon Ball Z: Abridged Episodes

TFS Dragon Ball Z: Abridged Parody Episode 30

Edit
Freeza: The Final Cut

Created by

TeamFourStar

Dates

6/17/12, 6/20/12, 6/25/12

Lengths

10:00, 10:09, 13:24

Total Length

33:33

Cast[]

Featuring[]

  • Hnilmik - Chichi

References[]

  • Kit Kat
  • Dawn/Day of the Dead
  • Iron Man
  • Godzilla
  • Citizen Kane
  • Darkwing Duck

Music[]

  • Imperial March
  • L'alba Dei Morti Viventi ("Dawn of the Dead" Theme)
  • Back in Black by AC/DC

Trivia[]

  • Freeza reads the disclaimer for this episode.

Quotes[]

Freeza: Oh, out of all the people I've blown to bits, that one will hold a special place in my heart. (Sees Goku starting to get angry) Oh what's wrong monkey? Come on now, give me something funny.
Goku: (Angrily) You... killed my best friend!
Freeza: Ha! That is pretty funny! Hilarious, actually.
(Lightning begins to strike everywhere, ground crumpling, and Goku's hair starting to turn gold. Goku lets out a loud roar and turns into a Super Saiyan)
Freeza: (Shocked) ... What?
Gohan: ... Dad?
Freeza: That's... That's not funny!
Freeza: You...You're different. What happened? What the hell are you?
Goku: Can't you tell, Freezer? It's just like Vegeta said.
Freeza: No, you f**king don't!
Goku: I am the hope of the omniverse! I am the lightbulb in the darkness! I am the bacon in the fridge for all living things that cry out in hunger! I am the Alpha and the Amiga! I am the terror that flaps in the night! I am Son Goku and I am a Super...
(Freeza fires an energy blast at Goku's face)...Saiyan.
(Freeza growls angrily)
Freeza: I have to admit this is new monkey, this is definitly new! But a monkey is still a monkey! And I've killed plenty in my day. Millions... Literally millions! What's the matter? Ran out of quips? Cat got your tongue? No more words to fail? You think now that you're this so called "Super Saiyan" that you're better than me? Lord Freeza!? WELL YOU'RE NOT! I own you! I own your planet! I own this planet! In fact... F**K THIS PLANET!!!
Goku: Wait, I zoned out there for a second. What?
(Gohan is flying Bulma back to the ship)
Bulma: Oh well, how nice of you to finally come and get me... Oh and you left me stranded all on my own to fend for myself. Planet's going to hell, I almost died, and I'M FREAKING THE F**K OUT!
Gohan: (Quite calmly) Bulma, how high would you have to fall from to hit terminal velocity?
(Bulma gets the message and gives no reply)
Gohan: I thought so.
Goku: D-Did you miss?
Freeza: How could I miss?
Goku: I don't know? How did ya?
Freeza: I know I hit the core. God! This always happens when I'm trying to perform under stress!
Goku: Seems to me like you just couldn't go through with blowing us both up!
Freeza: That's not the problem, you idiot! I can breathe in space!
Goku: (gasps) But space is a vacum!
Freeza: Honestly I say you only have...I don't know...5 min...is it 5? Ye-Yes 5! 5 minutes before this planet explodes and you perish along with it!
Goku: Oh. Well then I'll just to have kill you in 4!
Freeza: Wait hold on! I'm only at half my full power!
Goku: I don't see how that's my problem.
Freeza: No listen! If you let me power up...I'll give you a pizza.
Goku: You killed my best friend Freezer, that's not gonna work anymore!
Freeza: Two pizzas!
Goku: (Angrily) I said I'm done! (Charges at Freeza)
Freeza: With stuffed crust! (Goku stops. A long pause ensues)
King Kai: (Talking to Goku in his mind, angrily) Goku!
Goku: Now here me out King Kai! If I let him power up to 100% and beat him then, it'll demoramalize him and he'll never threaten anyone again!
King Kai: Goku, that is retarded!
Goku: Stuffed crust, King Kai! You could it eat in reverse.
King Kai: I-I can't even believe we're having this conversation.
Goku: Me either.
Freeza: Thanks for waiting by the way!
Goku: Hold on a second, King Kai. (To Freeza) What was that? (Freeza punches Goku in the stomach hard)
Freeza: SMASH MONKEY! SMASH MONKEY! (punches repeatedly at Goku)
Freeza: I just love how easy it is to get away with this sh*t with you people. I want to transform, you just sit there and let me. I want to blow the planet up, you just sit there and let me. I want to reach 100% power AND YOU JUST SIT RIGHT THERE AND LET ME!!
Goku: (still thinking about the two pizzas) So, can I get a meat lover's?
King Kai: And that is my star pupil. I don't even know why I bother.
Kami: King Kai are you there?
King Kai: Oh Kami, do you have an update for me?
Kami: Apparently it's all I'm good for anymore. I wanted to tell you that Mr. Popo has acquired the final Dragon Ball and is ready to summon the dragon.
King Kai: Awesome, now let me talk to him.
Kami: (Sighs) If you insist.
King Kai: All right now Mr. Po--(Antenna explodes) God! How the hell do you work with this guy!?
Kami: It's easier than you think.
Mr. Popo: I'm so f**king high right now! (Summons Shenron)
Shenron: I'm am the Eternal dragon! Speak your wish and I shall--(Notices and looks at Mr. Popo) Oh, it is you, my Master. Is it time to lay waste to this world?
Mr. Popo: Nah, not yet. Give them a couple hundred years. See if they can clean this up.
Shenron: Then how I might be of service, Lord Popo?
Mr. Popo: Good question. Kami, the f**k am I doing?
Kami: Good question. King Kai, the f**k is he doing?
King Kai: Ow, my Head! OK listen! I want you to bring back everyone Freeza and his men have killed.
Kami: Why?
King Kai: Are you questioning God?
Kami: Are you?
King Kai: NOT IN THE MOOD, KAMI!
Kami: Fine! Not my problem anyway. Mr. Popo--
Mr. Popo: I heard! Dragon, bring back all the worthless maggots that were killed by Freeza and his men...or whatever.
Shenron: As you command, so it shall be!
Freeza: Well now you're Super Saiyan soup! High in vitamin DUMBASS! (Laughs and looks up at the sky) Oh god, what's up with sky? This planet really is about to blow! I give it like... 2 minutes tops. I better get to my ship and-- (Freeza gets kneed in the face by Goku) (To Goku) STOP THAT! Stop not dying! You think you're better than me!? You're nothing but an overgrown monkey!
Goku: And you're nothing but an overgrown that thing Chi-Chi keeps in her drawer! (Thinking to himelf) Man! Freezer's stronger than ever at 100%. I'll have to stratergize! I know, a distraction! (To Freeza) Hey look, Freezer! A giant dragon!
Freeza: (looks and sees Porunga) What!? Well I'll be damned! Immortality is mine! (Leaves)
Goku: Oh, I am become error. (Leaves and starts fighting Freeza)
Freeza: Will you just piss off already!?
Goku: I don't have to use the bathroom!
Vegeta: (has just been brought back to life by the Porunga) When there's no more room in Hell, VEGETA SHALL WALK THE--(notices Namek about to explode) other hell. What the hell?
Freeza: (throws a Death Saucer at Goku) Hey monkey, you forgot your pizza!
Goku: Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me. (Goku nearly gets cut) That's not a pizza... THAT'S NOT A PIZZA AT ALL!!!!!
Freeza: HAAAAAH! MY ORGANS! Stay in there! Stay in your home! Daddy needs you!
Goku: Wow freezer. You were a *cut* above the rest!
Freeza: OOOUUUHH...
Goku: But too bad you didn't make the *cut*!
Freeza: UUOOOHHH...
Goku: Guess you could call this a slice of life.
Freiza: PLEASE STOP!
Goku: Alright, I'll cut you a break. I'm gonna split.
Freeza: WAIT! WAIT! WAIT! I, I know I've done a lot of terrible things... Killed quite a number of people, some of which you liked... Uh, but may I ask you... As one neighbor to another... Can you spare a cup of energy?
Goku: Well...
King Kai: NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!
Tien: I'm not even asking anymore...
Goku: HIIYAAH! Now be responsible with this energy! Don't use it to hurt anymore people! Or on the drugs.
Freeza: What? But... Why?
Goku: I'm gonna go home now. Got a long trip home. I'd ask if I could take one of your legs with me, but you're probably hungry too. Bye.
Freeza: Ugh-hhuuuuhh?
Freeza: (in thought) He's... Really just leaving me here... He gave me his energy and... Left me. Maybe this is a sign... Maybe I should change... Maybe this is, my second... And last... Chance... *Maybe*... I was wrong. NAAHH!!! (Lauching last emperor)
Goku: God dang it Freezer, now I have to give you more! (Lauching the angry kamehameha)
Freeza: *no*-no*-*no*-NO-NO-NO-No-EEEYAAAAAAAAAAH...! ! ! ! (Succumbed by the blast)

SILENCE

Goku: Huh... Don't see him anymore? Guess he took the energy and left. Speaking of which, Where am I going?

Also See[]

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